eternity in a moment

empty yourself
like pouring water from your soul
into a small and fragile cup

each moment that passes
is a moment farther
is a moment more
is a moment of strength

at times I am more empty than I
thought I would ever be able to bear
at times, I am so full I am an electric wire
overloading, sparking, smoking

what I want most of all is a hand
someone to reach out inside the insanity
offer balast
steady the tipping and trembling that touches
each moment
each breath

The only hand that matters
is mine

but mine are fluttering in vague patterns
not knowing what to do with themselves
dancing off rhythm, knocking things over

and what stands before me
is...
not what I expected...
confusing

I bite my lips
I sing a song
I change the diapers, kiss the booboos
and wonder

When I will wander
into a place of wonder
where someone, somewhere
will care
for me enough
that my hands settle softly at my sides. 

It should only take a moment
In the scheme of things