Without- Existing Inside Extinction

There is a smoke
That quietly kills and fills
The hollow places of what is carved
Inside my skull and makes it hard
To see

I am
Without
And I see them
Coming for me
The things that crawl and scream

I want to run and am rooted
Instead
In a quagmire of my own making
And the stench here makes it hard
To breathe

I am
Without
And I hear them
Wailing at me
The things that slash and cut

Feel the blood pulsing
Throbbing in my throat
Whispering curses to drain even my skin
Till every part and pore
Is dried and caked with itching scabs

Five decades of effort have made my
Skeleton
Thick
My heart holey, dripping with congealing
Plasma chunks and my tricks
To thin it out are failing

I am without
Air and am blacking out
So I grab desperately at flowers
And weeds, leaves and dirt and rocks
Stuffing them into my mouth
In a passionate pathetic hope to
Find oxygenation

Can anyone even see me
Here?
Can anyone even hear me
Here?

There are no maps
To Without
Where I'm forced to make my
Home
My skeletal fingers dig deep
Into the soil
Building planting creating

But not fast enough
To combat the Unmaker
His winds pull everyone away
Suck at the seeds and bend the saplings
Till they break
Again and again

I am not fast enough to build it
Alone
And that is
What I am

Alone
Without
Wilting
Breaking

A thousand hands touching
Do nothing when, withdrawing
They do not hold
Any part of me.
I am

Without