Sleeping alone

All that work
That long, rocky journey
Fire and ice, death and abandonment
And digging out of
Years worth
Of built up debris
And
Your reticent hand was there
To grasp
You helped me pull myself out
But
You pushed me back in
Accidentally?

And like a cat
You used your back legs
To bury me deeper with your eyes
Averted

I lost my own game
Thinking I could love and
Survive, again

Fireballs come quietly
In refusal to connect
And destroy as fiercely
As a tornado

Pulling me on and spitting me
Out
In pieces
That are a new puzzle to put
Back together

When you accidentally stole
Some pieces

How can I ask you
To let go of me
When you never meant to take
Any
Of
Me

I still
Sleep alone.