always a new challenge (poem)

I have a secret
that I do not want to keep
and I don't know how to define
pain and fear brought me down
this path
there is intimidation
without fear

our hearts
are not wrong
we are walking temples
for the winds
of the wilderness

lavender
cucumbers, mint, and rosemary
dark red wine
and crappy beer

litter boxes
and mud rooms
and far too many shoes

too much reality
and not enough connection

and the need never stops
and never should
though we reach for
a way to breathe

for blue skies

sun that tilts your head up
feeling like you are part flower
deep in your genes

porch swings
and new music

blank page future
and memories of burning fire
which are everything
that could possibly be

crumpling in cancerous fire

and the finger tip numbness
of worm holes catching creepy houses
and super heroes resurrected as back packs
till we find a place
that fits

these are the heart homes
that hold you
a shelter in the confusing storm
of weak and twisted minds

manifestations
of everything inside buzzing love moments
of nothing

and all that is left
is breathing
strong beer
chili
broccoli and chicken fingers
broken glass past
pictures of one step forward

and dirt
under
my fingernails

a day well done

until dawn